Today. For the Record.

Yesterday was one of those days that I wanted to write up on this blog... cause it was tough, and sometimes it helps to just share its ridiculousness and hope that it lightens the load a bit.

But then today came. And wow, today made yesterday seem... well, easy in comparison.

Andy's gone all of this week, doing retreats in Denver. So, I took an extra day of work off, and planned fun stuff to help the week go by. My mom sent me home from her place with food to cook for the rest of the week. Thanks, Mom! (I guess we never really grow up... thank god.) And generally we've had a great week. This is not something I'm incapable of doing - taking care of my kids by myself for a week. Single parents do it all the time! But, wow, it's hard. It's so freaking hard to do this parenting thing by yourself.

But when I say it 'generally' was a great week - what I mean is that the technical amount of time we had peace slightly outweighs the technical amount of time I have been battling my two adorable and yet infuriating children.

Today was one of the most continuously challenging and almost hilarious in its absurdity days as a parent I've had. I'm gearing up to write it all down, just for the record...

The morning started out by Maren throwing her (full) juice cup across the kitchen cause she was mad I gave a cup to Luke first... and so by about 7:30 this morning I had mopped the kitchen floor and tried to "punish" Maren by making her help... which she saw as fun. Hmm. Oh well.

Maren was mad that Luke was standing on her stool in the living room, so she grabbed him by the shirt, and yanked him onto the floor. He was fine, but WOW WAS MOMMY PISSED OFF. So, Maren spent about 20 minutes having a tantrum in her room while I held the door shut - basically for her protection, cause so help me god, I was mad! I needed to count to 10, as they say. Of course, this was only minutes after the whole 'juice' incident, which was only minutes after she got up, so she still hadn't gone potty yet. So, I let her out to go potty (her screaming was probably disturbing the neighbors, anyway), and she ran into the bathroom and continued to PEE ON THE FLOOR. Yes, right in front of the toilet, she just decided she would rather pee on the floor.

I asked her - Maren, why didn't you go in the potty?

Her answer: I didn't want to.

Hmmm. It's now 8am.

About this time, I decided we all needed a little fun so mommy decided to make Halloween pancakes. I'm not great in the kitchen (an understatement), but I try. And this was just a huge mistake with what I was dealing with. Soon after starting this adventure, I realized we were out of eggs.

So I piled them up into the car (after haggling over what to wear and then of course Luke pooped right as we were about to leave, so I had to change his diaper, and then we couldn't leave without more juice - no throwing this time, thankfully - and where on earth are your shoes?!), and by this time it's after 9am.

Maren has a tantrum in the car, refuses to get out. I basically bring her in, kicking and screaming, buy the eggs, and get back into the car. She is still crying. Luke is looking at her like, "What is going on with you today?" I have the same question.

By the time the pancakes are done (which don't look nearly as cool as they do in the Betty Crocker Halloween book), it's 10am, WAY TOO LATE to be eating breakfast - especially for my children who are susceptible to their father's condition of getting grumpy when he's hungry. Too late for that one!

Maren doesn't like the pancakes (which I've tried to make healthy with added flaxseed in the batter and yogurt in the maple syrup). Nothing gets by this girl, to my utter astonishment and frustration.

We had a peaceful few hours (ahhhhh): we went to the library, picked up some lunch (which Maren refused to eat), picked up Bea (Maren's preschool friend), and dropped the girls off at preschool. Luke slept. All was well with the world.

After preschool, the kids and I packed up some snacks, brought a blanket, and went and watched the JV football game around the corner from our house. It was a picturesque fall moment! My (suddenly) sweet kids, reading books, enjoying our healthy snacks, cheering on the team... And then...in a blink of an eye, without warning, it all changed.

I literally don't know what happened. Suddenly, both of my kids were running onto the field and refusing to listen to me - which is sort of embarrassing. So, I grab Maren and said, "You have a choice. Either you walk home with me now, or I carry you. What's it gonna be?" More screaming; more running. More embarrassment and stares... and some sympathetic looks from parents remembering their own kids, I'm hoping. (Right? Other parents have kids who behave horribly but still turn out all right in the end, right?!)

I grab her, smile at all of the annoyed onlookers, and carry her the three blocks home while she screamed loud enough to disturb the football huddle in the middle of the field. I just kept praying that Luke would not take off in the opposite direction, cause then I'd be seriously screwed.

Throw in a few more pushing/shoving/general fighting between two siblings, and Luke yelling "MINE!" every two minutes, and that's a pretty good picture of my day.

If I didn't write this down, it would be totally forgotten... which is generally a good thing. I've always been forgetful of the past - always looking ahead. As a parent, I think it's a great defense mechanism. Cause if you remembered every little whine and every little tantrum and every little (and sometimes big) infraction, that thing called unconditional love would get harder and harder.

And, well, kids' brains work kind of like mine - they don't remember that the minute before they giggle so wholeheartedly together they were mortal enemies fighting over who gets to turn the pages on the book. Today, Maren was the Jekyll to her otherwise Hyde personality (or is it the other way around?). But yesterday at Luke's doctor appointment, she held his hand as we walked into the room cause she remembered getting a shot the last time she went, and she told him, "It's going to be ok, Lukey; they're very nice and it only takes a second."

It was so freaking sweet, just remembering it makes today simply vanish for me. Thankfully. I guess I've gotta just choose to remember the good stuff. Which is essential on days like today.