It's been crazy around here. I keep waiting for things to get un-crazy, but it's been about 32 years of crazy, so maybe I should start getting used to it?
At any rate, I had a wonderful yesterday - even though both Andy and I were thinking a lot about work. I managed to get me some plants to plant, and that was my goal. I have adorable kids (even considering the emotional drama of the past week... a post for another time), an incredibly thoughtful husband (thanks for letting me sleep in, making me breakfast/lunch/dinner, etc.!), a home in a cozy and wonderful neighborhood... I am truly blessed.
I wanted to share with all moms (and those who love moms) a poem from my friend, Jan. Another Jan poem! Yay! This one was for two friends of ours who were having (and since, have had) a baby. There are tons of new babies around right now... I want to give a shout out to:
Evalyn, Emma, Aurora, Abram, Adeline, Benjamin, Banu.... I'm afraid I'm forgetting some...
And to their moms. This poem is for you:
Growing into “Mom”
For Emily and Tami
If this were composition class
and the assignment was what I love
about being a mother, I’d first confess this to be a head scratcher,
like explaining global warming in one paragraph.
There are so many opinions and people get emotionally involved.
But it was like this for me:
Pregnancy was the easy part. I could control
what I ate (sometimes),
how many evenings I showed up for water aerobics with
the other tired women in polyester balloon suits,
even how many times to beg for an epidural.
Not the case after delivery.
I was no longer in control and have since realized that control is over-rated anyway.
But in February of 1986 and January of 1988,
all I knew was that I didn’t always know
why they cried
and I couldn’t always comfort them
in ways they needed.
However, I always tried and I think even babies give you credit for that.
I married a guy who also tried, knew I did too, and loved me for it.
That made it so much easier.
Your husbands will be like that, Emily and Tami.
There is nothing like realizing that your baby smiles just for you.
That your words become some version of what she babbles.
That the crook of your arm and the smell of your skin
are why she settles and sighs.
It’s overwhelming, this dawn of new responsibility,
but it’s the most amazing aha moment in your life.
Your baby will never love another person as she loves you.
You will never love another as you love this child.
It’s a miracle but it doesn’t happen overnight.
So what I love most about being a mom
is the becoming.
Be patient – it will happen to you.
The little wispy willow that is your baby
will keep growing,
and she will help you become the best of all things:
a wonderful mother.
I know this because love is the best teacher.
And I promise that joy
Is around nearly every corner.
With Love and Friendship,
Jan Brown Oct. 24, 2008
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